Loyal followers...this is my shameless plug for my participation in the 2012 MS 150 cycling event in Columbia, MO. I will be riding alongside two champions in support of our mighty Team Saint Louis Cycling Captain, Diane and in support of the National MS Society's fight against MS. I was very fortunate to be invited to ride with a spectacular organization and team and hope to reach and hopefully exceed my goal of $750 by next weekend. I am a mere $120 away from reaching that goal.
Please reference the link below to access my personal donation page. Donations are absolutely positively tax deductible and can easily be submitted online via debit/credit cards featuring the Visa, Mastercard, Discover, and American Express logos. Please consider making a donation today. If you are in or around the Columbia, MO area - please come out and cheer us and all the participants on. We love cheerleaders!
Bike thieving has been a hot topic lately so I thought I would add my two cents. Bike thieves are the scum of the fucking earth. Worse than politicians - worse than cockroaches. They are the purest form of absolute scum.
<==SCUM!
If you have ever had the unpleasant experience of coming home or back to the place where you left your sweet ride only to realize it has been stolen....well, I can empathize and relate.
It goes a little something like this:
You find yourself riding along on a beautiful day in search of some sweet gear from the magic shop at the local strip mall. You park your awesome ride in a highly visible area at said mall. You take the necessary precautions when locking up the bike - including a gigantic, excessively long chain complemented by an equally excessive padlock. No one on earth can touch your precious bicycle with this much security right?
And then it happens....that sickening feeling you get when you come back to the spot where you parked your awesome ride and find that some scum of the earth asshole has stolen it. You panic - freak out - demand that everyone drop everything and start searching for the bike thieving predator in hopes that in some way - you will get your bike back.
The last two weeks or so have resulted in two super happy fuzzy panda success stories - one local and one a far. The local win happened because the owner effectively utilized social networking channels immediately following the incident. The word spread and people on the streets were on the look out. End result = bike was spotted, police were contacted, asshole on stolen bike was served, and the bike was returned to its rightful owner.
This dude gets his bike stolen and finds it listed for sale a few days later via Craigslist - Seattle. He sets up a bogus meeting posed as an interested buyer. Drives to meet the alleged thief in Seattle armed with friends, cameras, and the Seattle PD. Returns to Portland a happy panda with bike in tow.
Two happy endings in bicycle land. Not bad. I wasn't so lucky as we had two bikes nabbed from our garage last summer as we were literally moving from one house to the next. The thief was eventually caught, but the stolen goods were long gone.
What can cyclists do to avert the stolen bike nightmare?
1. ALWAYSlock your bike up - don't skimp on locks either. Take some time to research efficient and relatively thief-proof locks before you grab some random piece of junk off the rack. Some cyclists even use multiple lock combos for added security.
2. When possible - bring your bike inside to lock up. Some establishments are kind enough to allow this so take advantage.
3. When locking up outside - be sure to lock your bike in a highly visible area with as much pedestrian traffic and lighting as possible.
4. For Christmas sake - make sure you use your lock(s) efficiently. Go here for an example step-by-step guide and illustration. You paid good money for your locks - don't make it any easier on these assholes by not using them correctly.
That's it for this week's installment of crazy ramblings.....until next time.
So rather than rant and rave on about the imperfections of life and the universe - I have decided to mix it up a bit and add random top whatever posts. I may select five or ten of five hundred. Don't pressure me.
Our first installment features: Movies That Most Accurately Depict the Ups and Downs of Drug Use/Abuse
Yes, these precious gems remind us why drugs are indeed bad no matter how much you try and weigh out the good. The bad always wins. These films should replace all D.A.R.E, Just Say No, and PDFA propaganda because they portray a more accurate reality of what drug use/abuse consists of..for the most part. Before I begin the list - let's review some of the anti-drug material we were forced to absorb as children with some added commentary. Thank your friends at Partnership for a Drug Free America for these classics.
1. Parents who use drugs have children who use drugs. (1987)
It's marijuana for fooks sake. He should be so proud that his pops showed him how to roll a proper joint.
2. The Cost of Snorting!
- Is it just me or does anyone else find this to be hilarious? Maybe I am an asshole. What's with the tear at the end?
3. Clint Eastwood Gonna Fuck You Up, Crackhead!
- If Clint Eastwood threatens - we listen. Crack is whack, yo!
Pee Wee Agrees!
- Eh hem....little known fact. Pee Wee went on to star in one of the best drug-related biopics alongside Johnny Depp. Can you guess the film?
5. This Is Your Breakfast!
- This anti-drug PSA is by far the best of the best. I enjoyed it so much that I actually had a poster of the extended version (comical form) on my bedroom wall as a kid. I'd like a side order of bacon with that. Any questions?
Now for the films....sorted by the featured drug of choice. Several of these films are based on actual events. Many also include several others substances in the film but the ultimate downfall usually focused on one specific substance. I intentionally left marijuana out because no one dies from marijuana 'abuse' even though it is the 'gateway drug', man.
1. Trainspotting (Drug of choice: Heroin) 2. Basketball Diaries (Drug of choice: Heroin) 3. Requiem For A Dream (Drug of choice: Heroin) 4. Killing Zoe (Drug of choice: Heroin) 5. Sid & Nancy (Drug of choice: Heroin) 6. Blow (Drug of choice: Cocaine) 7. Boogie Nights (Drug of choice: Cocaine) 8. Scarface (Drug of choice: Cocaine) 9. Traffic (Drug of choice: Heroin, Cocaine, Crack) 10. Less Than Zero (Drugs of choice: Crack, Cocaine, Speed) 11. 24 Hour Party People (Drugs of choice: MDMA, Cocaine, Heroin, Crack) 12. Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas (Drug of choice: EVERYTHING!)
OK so I snuck that last one in there for shits and giggles. Hunter S. Thompson was a madman and a bit of a fiend but somehow never pushed his drug consumption to the point of prostitution, stealing, or death.
On that note - I leave you with this final reminder:
Ever get a chronic case of the fuckits and feel as though it will never be cured? That, my friends, is the constant state of mind I have found myself in for the last month and some change. My head feels a bit like...well, this fellow to my left. Boom!
Social networking...sometimes it's useful. Most times - it seems like a pain in the ass. Over the past several months, there has been an abundance of political banter and a disturbing increase in ridiculous meme posts. I understand the desire to post the occasional funny pictures/memes, but there is no need for the rapid fire posts every single day. It is all I see from some users. Seeing Willy Wonka seventeen times with seventeen different cutesy sayings in one day....well, that is just a bit too much. As far as politics and religion (and I am guilty here as well) - social networking sites are not the best place to discuss considering the audience demographics are all over the place. Sure - everyone has the right to believe what they want to believe and by all means vote for whatever politician trips their wire, but I don't need to see all the negativity and bullshit day after day after mother loving day. I am going to do my part and try to avoid discussing either topic from now until eternity. I will be unbearably happy and grateful once that damn election is over too. Uncharacteristically happy perhaps! OK - maybe I've gone to far with that last statement.
Elections bring out the absolute worst in adults, and I am extremely glad that I do not have cable so I do not have to see the barrage on smear campaign ads. Don't get me wrong here, folks. I will most certainly vote at all three levels - local, state, and federal. I certainly have concerns about the upcoming election considering the level of stupidity involved with some individuals that unfortunately will also be voting. We often seem to forget about the big picture and narrow in on whatever the topic of choice is or should I say whatever topic the candidates pull out of their ass to use as means of swaying votes - namely topics involving religion, abortion, and......that's right...equal rights. I am sure as shit gay marriage will once again be a hot topic of debate on the upcoming panels. It shouldn't be as it should be a non-issue - meaning shit can DOMA so we can move on - but it will. Religious freedoms are on the state ballot this year - protecting the whole ability to pray to GOD - not Allah or any other religious figure but only GOD - in schools. Well, what about the kids who worship and idolize the FSM? If you can decode that acronym - you win a pony. If you can't - well, that's what that super awesome research tool known as the Internet is for.
Mother should I run for President?
At any rate - all I can do is my part. Vote and tell my rowdy band of hooligans to do the same. No vote = no voice.....and GOD kills a unicorn...helpless, rainbow pooping unicorns. Now let us bow our heads and enjoy some good ol' Cube.
